ton ton

i know he reads but he doesn’t leave comments or even tell me about what i write. he did tell me though that blogs are supposed to be short. i guess i have so many things to say, ton.

he’s one of my best friends. although we went to the same school, we didn’t know each other until we found ourselves as officemates in the company which we consider now as “the lost dream”. at first i thought he’s mayabang. you know… that typical rich and gwapo braggart but then he didn’t brag about anything. i just thought he was unapproachable. well, what can i do? they all knew each other and i was the only girl and the only non-techie person in that office. they too find me very suplada because i never talked to them and i was very contented doing my own stuff. it was a good thing he initiated in inviting me for lunch or coffee because it paved way for us to really know each other well. i know his preference when it comes to girls. he liked it when i go out for my biweekly grocery shopping for our office because he knew i will tolerate all that he picks for himself and not for the whole office. when he says coffee na tayo, that would mean synchronized movement to figaro or starbucks and that would also mean talking about pretty girls, dreaming, orchestrating some conspiracy theories about our situation in the office and a lot of backbiting. i couldn’t remember though if we got to talk about boys.teka, lugi ako dun ah. our trips to dswd, camp crame and wherever else were really time for us to talk about our lovelives and about almost anything else (including my crush to a certain varsity player in our school. LOL!) of course it was non-negotiable when we decided to have our tables placed side by side during the time the big boss chose to have a bigger office.

when i went to manila just this month we went out for a date. no, not that romantic date… just two friends catching up with each other. we both brought our cameras hoping that we will be able to bond again by taking some pictures since we are both into it already. as usual, we ate, had coffee, talked and listened. he showed me his compilation of pictures and we hopped around several shops to look for a suitable bag for his laptop and camera which i actually enjoyed because i couldn’t believe how mindblowing the prices are of bags nowadays. in short, i had a great time with him.

i just realized this. he always has time for me. he always makes it a point to text back, call or answer back in YM whenever i need him. he never ever gave me some headache or heartache about the advices he gives me and oftentimes shows a certain point or view in a such a way that i will be able to think about it but never feel bad about it. i don’t know if he feels obliged or just can’t say no to me but i do appreciate the fact that he tolerates me when i vent and when i do that, he actually listens. don’t you ever get tired or me, ton? actually, i don’t want to know the answer. it’s mainly because i want to stick to the idea that he is a very good friend to me and i hope i am to him also. reasons and rationalizations are beyond me. i just know that i appreciate the friendship more than anything else.

so to you, ton, thank you for being such a good friend to me. see you soon… of course, with our cameras again and never ending kulitan.

PS

girls, take note. gwapo yan. hehehe!

House

today, i’m going to have date with Dr. House with my popcorn, chips, dip and cans of Pepsi max.

i’ve had it!

enough is enough! it’s time for me to get hold of my life by pulling all the strings of courage and move on. it has been a week already and a lot of people have done a lot of things while i mope and feel sorry for myself. that’s just it and if i still continue to be this pathetic, nothing will happen to me. so let’s just smile… okay??

breakaway

i’m a dreamer… a big time dreamer. maybe it’s because i always feel like the world has a lot to offer to me. as a kid, i had so many wants to be. i wanted to become a nurse, teacher, firewoman, soldier, businesswoman, dancer, singer and to be loved and happy. the latter might sound weird because i am always showered with love (only in a weird way) but i always yearn for something of which i couldn’t explain explicitly. there is some sort of constant struggle which chains me to a certain kind of angst. maybe it’s the love itself or the desired freedom… i don’t know… that’s why i love it when it rains.. it feels like my soul is being detoxified and nourished… like as if my mind is cleared of inherent disquietude… i get to think and reevaluate my life.

i have to confess

i have to confess. i really, really have to confess. if i won’t say this i will be continually hurt by the comments of other people. this confession will somehow make people understand that even if they don’t do it intentionally, i still get affected, and on behalf of that person, i have to say this:

he is a simple person and although he’s famous, he somehow guards his privacy in the best way he can. he is a prayerful person opting to fast in times that he thinks he had to do it. he yearns for a very fruitful and meaningful relationship with his Lord and Saviour. that’s why he showcases proper decorum in dealing with a lot of issues because he thinks it is just the right thing to do despite of the fact that the issues thrown at him are very less dignified. still, he smiles and pray for his detractors opting to even forgive a nemesis.

so spare him, okay? you are hurting me as much you are hurting him. i like him a lot and no matter what other people say about him, i will protect him with all my might. yes, i know you’ll say that i’m crazy having to exert my greatest effort to waste this post for him but well, he truly deserve this space.

look at how meek and gentle he is. i’m sure a lot of girls will agree with me but, hey, he’s mine, okay? see for yourself.

so i have to confess. i think i love him…